Xenimated greetings. We now have a near-definitive tracklisting for the monstrous new Ninja Cuts compilation and thought we should probably share it with you, our dear online friends, before you found out about it somewhere else and bombarded us with evil viruses (ah, the much-maligned virus, can it truly be evil? Or is it a vehicle for the evil of others? Discuss). Anyhow, in-depth analysis of every track is supplied so that you will undeniably know more about the Ninja empire in ohwhy2kay than almost anyone else. Ever. Haha. Now they'll wish they didn't laugh at your glasses in the playground...
XEN CUTS [CD1] Big Dada Sound 'Showtime' Recorded in a hut on the outskirts of Hull. Dynamic Syncopation '2 The Left' They met Mass Influence at agricultural college studying sedimentation. The Herbaliser '8pt Agenda' Milton Vasquez can breakdance to this tune. Happy Campers 'No Mind' Sounds good if you snort baking soda. Cabbageboy 'Rhythm & Blues Angus Steakhouse' He really is a brassica. It's true. Neotropic 'Memories' Cover of the famous showtune from Evita. Amon Tobin 'Saboteur' (Roots Manuva version) Fact: they worked together at Woolies. Mr Scruff 'Ug' His beard is painted on using a very fine Rotring pen. T Love 'QMS' (The Process mix) Used a 300 person choir from Gdansk on the chorus. DJ Vadim 'Your Revolution' (version) Doesn't speak any English. Communicates via sign, translated by his pet rapper parrot. Kid Koala 'Emperors Main Course' Don't belive the hype: he's in his fifties. Coldcut 'Give It Up' Don't believe the hype: they're not out of their teens. Up, Bustle & Out 'Hip Hop Barrio' 'Barrio' means 'plank' in Latin. 'Hip Hop' means 'long' in the same dead tongue. Luke Vibert 'I Hear The Drummer' Luke Vibert has been signed to Ninja Tune for the last six years and has released four pseudonymous albums for the label. Fink feat. Frank Chickens 'Ninjah (We Are Ninja)' They met at Lancaster Polytechnic at the annual Sausage Roll Throwing contest.
XEN CUTS [CD2] Clifford Gilberto 'The 10th Victim' Eats only cheese. Cinematic Orchestra & PC 'Soul Pride' Used to be the Bournemouth Philharmonic Orchestra. Up, Bustle & Out 'Los Locos Cubanos' (Snowboy mix) Builds ships out of the bits of plasticine that get under your nails after a long modelling session. Amon Tobin 'Down & To The Left' Has an aunt called 'Carrot'. Loka 'My Life In These Bottles' Named after a classic fifties model of the Trabant. Chris Bowden 'Original Sin' A martyr to his feet. Clifford Gilberto 'Restless' Oh, and Quavers... Animals On Wheels 'Build A Church with Your Fear' Designed the original manga dustbin. DJ Food feat. Ken Nordine 'Ageing Young Rebel' (remix) Walked to Jerasulem and back on a spare Saturday. Flanger 'Quicksilver Loom' They eat balloons - but only if they're inflated. Funki Porcini 'Big Sea' Owns a turnip battery farm. Max & Harvey 'Big Amoeba Sound' Use pseudonyms at the supermarket.
There really is nothing left to say about the third disc that hasn't already been said by the press... XEN CUTS (Missed, Flipped & Skipped) Saul Williams 'Twice The First Time' "A huge conifer" - Gardening Times DJ Vadim 'Non Lateral Hypothesis' "The most gadgetty gadget this year" - Sad Gadgets Mag Coldcut 'More Beats & Pieces' (John McEntire Tortoise mix) "The best thing to happen to soaps since Tiff left 'Enders" - Soap Now The Cinematic Orchestra 'Channel 1 Suite' (Hefner remix) "Every so often one comes along" - The Guardian Sukia 'Feelin' Free' (DJ Food remix) "Very well laid out" - Feng Shui Magazine Funki Porcini 'Carwreck' (Wagon Christ mix) "Mind The Gap" - London Underground DJ Food 'Peace Pt 1' "Beats Turps any day" - DIY Monthly Mr Scruff 'Happy Band' "Apply a little grease to the lens" - Amateur Photographer Kid Koala 'Drunk Trumpet' (Live at The Metro, Chicago) "tpgbefkly" - Random Letters Quarterly The Irresistible Force 'Nepalese Bliss' (Jimpster mix) "If you're not going to take this seriously you can't play" - Tony Blair Dynamic Syncopation 'Stealth' Hexstatic 'Ninja Tune' (The Process mix) Roots Manuva 'Movements' (live) EFB 'Tried By 12' (Squarepusher mix) Amon Tobin feat. Chris Morris 'Bad Sex' Quincey 'Bruce Lee MC' (edit)